Posts tagged ‘cake’

Back to School

Even though parents, teachers, and kids in Alabama aren’t happy that their summer ended several weeks ago, school has started or will be starting soon for kids across the country. Best of luck to all those returning to the classroom, regardless which side of the desk you’re on.

Here are a few rib-ticklers about (and appropriate for) the classroom.

Father: Did you learn a lot in math class today?
Son: Apparently not! They want me to come back again tomorrow!

Why did the student eat her homework?
Because she thought it was “a piece of cake.”

A young boy asked his grandmother for help with his math homework. “I need to find the least common denominator,” he told her. 
“My goodness,” his grandmother replied. “I can’t believe they still haven’t found that. They were looking for that when I was in school!”

August 23, 2010 at 8:18 pm Leave a comment

Let Them Eat Cake!

Instead of giving a toast just before the meal, the best man at my wedding asked if he could give his toast just before we cut the cake. It was an odd request, and it didn’t really matter to me — but more importantly, it didn’t matter to my wife — so we agreed. This is how he ended his toast:

Today is May 16, and you know that today is a special day for Patrick and Nadine. But what you may not know is that today is an important day in history — Marie Antionette was beheaded on May 16. So as she said, “Let them eat cake!”

With that, all guests were directed to the wonderful cake prepared by my wife’s high school friend, Kate Zuckerman, who, at the time, was the pastry chef at Chanterelle, a five-star restaurant in New York City.

All this talk of decapitation reminds me of a joke…

A priest, a rabbi and a mathematician are in the queue to be decapitated.

The priest’s head is put in the slot and the executioner pulls the lever. The blade moves a few inches but then stops before reaching the priest’s neck. The executioner raises the blade again and releases it, but again, it stops short of its target. The priest declares that the hand of God had intervened, so the executioner lets him go.

The rabbi’s head is then put in the slot. The executioner pulls the lever, the blade drops, but again it stops before reaching the rabbi’s neck. The executioner lets the rabbi go, assuming that God had intervened again.

The mathematician’s head is put in the slot. He looks upward and smiles.

“What are you so happy about?” the executioner asks.

“I figured out the problem,” says the mathematician. “A small pebble is blocking the path of the blade. If you remove the pebble, it should work just fine!”

May 16, 2010 at 2:13 am Leave a comment

About MJ4MF

The Math Jokes 4 Mathy Folks blog is an online extension to the book Math Jokes 4 Mathy Folks. The blog contains jokes submitted by readers, new jokes discovered by the author, details about speaking appearances and workshops, and other random bits of information that might be interesting to the strange folks who like math jokes.

MJ4MF (offline version)

Math Jokes 4 Mathy Folks is available from Amazon, Borders, Barnes & Noble, NCTM, Robert D. Reed Publishers, and other purveyors of exceptional literature.

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