Cows and Probability

May 3, 2014 at 10:39 pm Leave a comment

Bert Tolkamp et al. were awarded an Ig Nobel Prize for answering a question that has long been on the minds of readers of this blog, and likely on the minds of the populace at large:

Are cows more likely to lie down the longer they stand?

I mean, seriously, how many nights have you lain awake pondering that question?

Their research revealed two startling facts:

  • The longer a cow has been lying down, the more likely that the cow will soon stand up.
  • Once a cow stands up, it’s impossible to predict how long until that cow lies down again.

Fascinating.

I, for one, will rest easier knowing that these questions have finally been answered.

If you suffer from insomnia, the full article may be more valuable than Unisom, chamomile tea, or counting sheep.

You have to wonder if the researchers used a cow-culator to calculate the probabilities. Or perhaps that had to rely on techniques from advanced cow-culus.

Why do milking stools only have three legs?
Because the cow has the udder!

What do Greek cows say?
μ.

What do you call a male cow that swallows a hand grenade?
Abominable.

What do you call the same cow 5 seconds later?
Noble.

Here are some other mathy cow jokes I’ve posted in the past.

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About MJ4MF

The Math Jokes 4 Mathy Folks blog is an online extension to the book Math Jokes 4 Mathy Folks. The blog contains jokes submitted by readers, new jokes discovered by the author, details about speaking appearances and workshops, and other random bits of information that might be interesting to the strange folks who like math jokes.

MJ4MF (offline version)

Math Jokes 4 Mathy Folks is available from Amazon, Borders, Barnes & Noble, NCTM, Robert D. Reed Publishers, and other purveyors of exceptional literature.

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