Archive for February 28, 2012

10 Jokes for an Ordinally Day

Ten of my favorite jokes, in order. Sort of.

A mathematician calls the hospital and says, “My wife is in labor! What should I do?”
“Calm down,” the nurse tells him. “Is this her first child?”
“No,” the man replies. “This is her husband.”

Did you hear about the hungry clock?
It goes back four seconds.

Three mathematicians walk into a bar. You’d think the third one would have ducked.

First, second, third… and so fourth.

Wherever there are four mathematicians, you’ll usually find a fifth.

Thank you for calling Sixth Sense Analytics. We are unable to answer your call at this time, but we already know who you are, what you want, and where you live, so please hang up at the beep.

The topologist said, “If I had known that I’d feel this full after all those doughnuts, I would have eaten the seventh one first.”

Your mama’s so fat, she could be the eighth continent.

Several bass violinists had too much wine before their performance of Beethoven’s masterpiece. They performed reasonably well through most of the piece, but near the end, they began to miss some notes. The conductor lamented, “It’s the bottom of the Ninth, and the bassists are loaded.”

A minister told his congregation, “I know it’s difficult to tithe, but don’t worry. If you can’t afford to give a tenth of your salary to the church, then just give a ninth or even an eighth.”

February 28, 2012 at 10:55 pm Leave a comment

About MJ4MF

The Math Jokes 4 Mathy Folks blog is an online extension to the book Math Jokes 4 Mathy Folks. The blog contains jokes submitted by readers, new jokes discovered by the author, details about speaking appearances and workshops, and other random bits of information that might be interesting to the strange folks who like math jokes.

MJ4MF (offline version)

Math Jokes 4 Mathy Folks is available from Amazon, Borders, Barnes & Noble, NCTM, Robert D. Reed Publishers, and other purveyors of exceptional literature.

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February 2012

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