Archive for February 18, 2011

I Like My Women Like I Like My Math

My father had a predilection for embarassing my mother. For instance, when a waitress would ask how he’d like his coffee, he’d say:

I like my coffee like I like my women — hot, sweet, and light.

My father was the original bigot chauvinist. Had I been taking notes, I could have written Sh*t My Dad Says twenty years ago.  Here are a few other similes that I think my father would have appreciated:

I like my women like I like my mathematics — pure and beautiful, not complex and irrational.

I like my women like I like my math tests — full of problems, and easy to cheat on.

I like my women like I like my math problems — simple and easy.

I like my women like I like my calculus textbooks — full of curves.

I like my women like I like my research papers — interesting, intelligent, and covered in ink.

I like my women like I like my data — average, and within my range. 

I like my women like I like my equations — well-balanced.

I like my women like I like the tenth positive odd number — prime, and over 18.

I like my women like I like my ellipses whose major and minor axes are almost equal — just a little eccentric.

I like my women like I like the roots of x2 + 2x + 1 = 0 — degenerate, and easy to find.

I like my women like I like my calculator-dependent students — with no interest in multiplying.

February 18, 2011 at 9:49 am Leave a comment


About MJ4MF

The Math Jokes 4 Mathy Folks blog is an online extension to the book Math Jokes 4 Mathy Folks. The blog contains jokes submitted by readers, new jokes discovered by the author, details about speaking appearances and workshops, and other random bits of information that might be interesting to the strange folks who like math jokes.

MJ4MF (offline version)

Math Jokes 4 Mathy Folks is available from Amazon, Borders, Barnes & Noble, NCTM, Robert D. Reed Publishers, and other purveyors of exceptional literature.

Ratings

Past Posts

February 2011
M T W T F S S
« Jan   Mar »
 123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
28  

Enter your email address to subscribe to the MJ4MF blog and receive new posts via email.

Join 84 other followers

Visitor Locations

free counters

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 84 other followers