Kids' Favorite Jokes

I have twin sons. They’re 3½ years old, and they love numbers. As shown below, they love calculators, too — Eli (on the left) prefers the TI‑73 Explorer, while Alex prefers the TI‑83 Plus.

They used to enjoy the Alpha‑Lock feature, because they could type their name, our address, and other words. But recently, they’ve been having fun entering expressions to see the result. Their grandpa called the other day, and when he heard they were playing with calculators, he started quizzing them with addition problems. (Understand, I have an issue with the boys “learning” their number facts with a calculator before they understand the concept. That said, I’m pretty sure they understand addition conceptually, and even if they don’t, who am I to prevent Pop Pop from having fun with his grandsons?) He began by giving them some one-digit addition problems: 2 + 3, 5 + 8, etc. They’d enter the expressions and then tell him the answer. (Usually, I’d cover the screen so they couldn’t see the answer, and I’d make them figure the answer in their head first.) Then he asked them, “What is 12 + 12?” Without entering anything, Alex said, “12 is 6 + 6, so 12 + 12 is 6 + 6 + 6 + 6.” He paused to think for a moment, then asked, “How much is four 6′s, daddy?”

“Holy crap,” I said to my wife. “He’s ready for multiplication!”

My wife rolled her eyes. “Easy there, tiger,” she said. “He’s only 3½.”

Then yesterday, Pop Pop called again and asked the boys, “Who wants to give me a math problem?” I could not have been prouder when Eli said,

What do you get when a bird crosses a zero?

Pop Pop was confused by the question until Eli shouted the answer:

A flying none!

(Actually, I suppose I could have been prouder had Eli said, “You can’t cross them, because zero is a scalar.”)

Alex then offered a joke as well:

What did 0 say to 8?

Nice belt!

It seems the rotten apple doesn’t fall far from the infested tree.

Anyway, here’s a math joke about twins…

A statistician’s wife gives birth to twins. Excitedly, he calls everyone to share the good news. When he calls the minister, the minister says, “That’s terrific! Bring them down to church this Sunday, and we’ll baptize them!”

“Uh, let’s just baptize one of them,” says the statistician. “We can keep the other one as a control.”

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